Friday, April 9, 2010

England Pro/Con


Matt here:

So we have been here for a little over a month now and we have learned a lot about living in Britain and I thought I would lay out all the things that I like about Britain and the things I don't really like:

Pro: Cars

So the cars are nicer here, they just are. No they are not big, but I think that whole giant American car thing is ridiculous. Here is why they are better in the UK:

They get way better gas mileage (40-60 mpg).

They are small, but very nice. In the US, small cars almost always mean cheaply made. However here, everything is small so there are upper end small cars. They also handle better and have better tires (cause of the rain).

One interesting thing is that they are almost all hatchbacks (warning, this may only be interesting to an engineer) but it appears that the best way to make a small car with plenty of interior room is to make it a hatchback. In fact, you never see small sedans and when you think about it, it is not a good way to make a car small. Our tiny Toyota is actually pretty large on the inside and it is really surprising.

Also turbo diesels, everything over here is a turbo diesel. We can't get them because of our emission laws but they need to be changed because they are great engines.


Conclusion, you can make a nice, safe, small car, with good interior room, fantastic gas mileage and nice options. America is way behind on this one.


Con - Car Styling (some)

So most cars I like but some, wow, are ugly, I give you this example:



Seriously, that is probably the ugliest car I have ever seen. I dare you to sell one of those in the US.

Now, that being said lots of cars are very nice but there are certain cars that are very strange and ugly to me.

Pro: Roadside Conveniences

So if you are on the highway (motorway in UK speak) and you want to get a snack or go to the bathroom etc it is not like the US where you simply pull over on the next overpass and go to a gas station. In fact, if you make the next exit you are likely to get dumped into a tiny village with no services what so ever. Instead, they have service stations; they have their own exits and one on each side of the highway.

Everyone I have been to is almost identical and they are like a mini shopping mall. They have a convenience store, cafeteria, fast food, coffee shop, clean bathrooms and a gas station. It is just nice to know that you are going to get good options. Sometimes you want a fast food hamburger, but maybe other times you want an espresso with croissant. The things is they are everywhere and they are all the same. Its nice.

I have actually had many meetings in them. It is easy to just say, “How about we meet at the service station off the M6?”

Con: The Full English Breakfast

The full English breakfast...what can I say? Firstly, let me start by expressing a personal theory I have, which is that breakfast is the most conservative meal of the day. Meaning, people don't really like to take risks at breakfast. Essentially, worldwide, for breakfast people really just want what they have eaten for breakfast every other day of their life. I have seen this everywhere I have traveled.

So in Britain (in Scotland they call it a Full Scottish Breakfast, although it is identical) what everyone seems to think breakfast should be is this:



And to prove my later point, I typed in “Full English Breakfast” in to Google image and this is what I got, pages of identical meals. So here is what it is:

Fried Eggs
Fried Sausage (oddly bland and soft)
British Bacon (more like Canadian bacon to us, it’s not crispy)
Broiled Mushrooms (unsalted)
Broiled Whole Tomato (unsalted and disgusting)
Baked Beans
Hash browns (but like the ones at McDonalds, not delicious US cafe hash browns)
Black Pudding (yes it’s made from blood, it is also great, and I love it)

So that’s it, everywhere, only that, in every hotel and BB and across this small island. Want breakfast, guess what you are getting?

Now, there are other options (you can get toast, eggs, porriage, maybe smoked salmon) and certainly cereal, but you really feel they want you to eat the Full English.

And again, my theory of breakfast applies to myself as well, so what I really want is crispy bacon, eggs and US hash browns. Or if we dare to dream, a breakfast burrito, with potato and green chili…

The point is, don’t get your hopes up about breakfast. Now in your own home of course, blinds closed so the neighbors can’t see, you can eat as you like.

I talked to another Ex-pat and he said the thing he missed most about America was Denny’s, or Shari’s, or Village Inn or somewhere to eat breakfast. And although I didn’t see his point at the time I can see how he got there.

Pro – Roundabouts

Here’s the thing about roundabouts, they only work if everyone knows how they work. And in Britain, they know how they work. It is amazing how much traffic from four directions flows through a roundabout; it is 10x that of a traffic light. The guy at the dealership I bought Tif’s car from told me that they used to have a light in front of the dealership and there were traffic jams constantly. They changed to a roundabout and the traffic is rarely stopped.

Once you get used to them it is hard to see why you would do it another way. The problem in America is that because no one knows how to use them traffic slows down as everyone tries to figure out what is going on and then everyone thinks they are dumb and slow.

Con – Littering

I think I was a bit spoiled in Colorado with littering. No one litters, not on purpose. I grew up there and it seems to me like a mental illness to litter on the ground. If you throw a fast food wrapper on the ground, on purpose, in Fort Collins and anyone saw you would be yelled at on the spot, maybe beaten.

Not the case here. Although I have not seen anyone littering it is clearly a major issue. It is really not necessary to explain in detail the effect of this because you can all picture it but wow, it really is a total waste. It ruins whole areas just out of a series laziness.

If I had a magic wish, it would be that every item of trash you dropped on the ground would magically appear in your bed that night. That would fix it.

Here are some other smaller items:

Pro:

UHP Milk – Lasts unrefrigerated for months, great if you have kids and taste fine.

Cider – It’s nice to have another alcoholic option

BBC Documentaries – I watched one the other day on “Bread”. That was it, the history of bread in Britain. 2 hours on BBC 3 at primetime. Sounds boring but I thought it was awesome. Also, don’t even get me started on David Attenborough…

Instant Coffee – So this one I am a bit surprised on but it is growing on me. It is really convenient.

Crumpet w/ Butter and Marmite – This is an acquired taste but I have definitely acquired it.

Cons:

Wimpy Hand Dryers – No towels, only the wimpiest breath of air. Just put up a sign saying, “Sorry but we don’t like cleaning up your towels so please wipe hands on pants.”
(note: The Dyson hand dryers are great)

Dual Faucet Sinks – Seriously it is 2010. Run a pipe between the scalding hot water and the freezing cold one so I can have a usable temperature. The sad thing is that they are still installing them that way, brand new houses: rubber plug, hot and cold, no pipe between (it is not rocket science, why are you punishing yourselves!?).

7 comments:

Tif said...

"If you throw a fast food wrapper on the ground, on purpose, in Fort Collins and anyone saw you would be yelled at on the spot, maybe beaten."

That made me laugh out loud, Matt. It's so true!

dove said...

Great post, Matt!

"If I had a magic wish, it would be that every item of trash you dropped on the ground would magically appear in your bed that night."

Too funny. That would TOTALLY get the job done!

Mimi said...

Matt, I enjoy reading your veiwpoint. Very interesting.

You know, here in Valparaiso, IN.... U.S. of A., we have 3..count 'em....3 roundabouts. And no one (except my newly licensed granddaughter) knows how to use them! But we are a young Nation and we will learn.
Drive safely.

jwjacole said...

Loved the "yelled at" or "beaten" phrase. That is so true. In Boulder you would probably be tared and feathered, but it works. The added problem is the gum on the ground.
I agree about the round abouts. They really make sense. I agree wih Mimi, it will take a generation change.
Can't wait for Dad to try driving in UK and see all the different car options. Great reflection.

K. C. Wells said...

Excellent points, Prez. People in Lexington don't know how to use roundabouts, either. It makes me CRAZY.

I also really love the same quote Dove mentioned. It would be awesome for people to sleep in their own trash! LOL

Lisa said...

Hey there, Matt! I just read your post on this bright and sunny Sunday morning. Gotta say: the pics of the "full" breakfast--not so appetizing. Everything looks kinda soggy and soft. Is a bagel an exotic menu item there?

And you're so right about the trash situation! It's one of the things I revel in here in CO and am always shocked at the roadside trash in the south and midwest.

Take care!

Mama Wook said...

Now that was just hilarious, particularly your breakfast hypothesis. I really do need to challenge myself at breakfast.

"Full Irish" is something I've witnessed. It looks the same in Ireland, too. My own travel hypothesis: If it's a foreign country and has the word "full" in front of it (e.g. Full Monty), it's best just to keep walking. Briskly.

~Cousin Amy